The best thing about this bag is that it oozes pure Williamsburg hipster irony but none of them will be able to afford it so as a result they’ll actually end up hating it. This is poetry in motion people. Drink it in.
Police say a Massachusetts man who allegedly stuffed 75 bottles of body lotion in his pants couldn’t make a smooth getaway, hampered by slacks that were nearly bursting at the seams.
Springfield police say 30-year-old Chamil Guadarrama of Framingham was charged with larceny after the incident Wednesday night at Bath and Body Works in the Eastfield Mall.
Police say mall security officers chased Guadarrama, but he had stuffed so many of the eight-ounce lotion containers in his pants that he could barely run. Police say he could not bend over to get in the police cruiser until some of the bottles were removed.
It could not immediately be determined if Guadarrama has an attorney. A telephone number for Guadarrama could not immediately be located Thursday.
Notable puns:
“Smooth”
“Seems like quite a slippery character.”
“What a Smooth Criminal.”
“Sounds like he really got creamed.”
