Monthly Archive for December, 2010

Fuck this shit…I want them to keep the show running so it can at least open officially once.
I want to experience this train wreck.

Asap please. I wanna go before they figure things out and the show gets better… because who wants to see that?

Train-wrecks are entertaining. I feel as if the world is going through a serious phase of Schadenfreude (pleasure derived from the misfortunes of others) at the moment and we won’t soon change our ways. We generally enjoy watching people fall or look like idiots so we latch onto forms of entertainment that showcase this happening on a regular basis.

We latch onto shows like Jersey Shore, American Idol (the initial auditions anyway… why people continue watching that show is beyond me) and the Real Housewives of where-ever the fuck. Now I haven’t seen that show but from what I gather, it’s mostly about women sitting at dinner tables (or coffee tables) and arguing about how they got disrespected by some bitch in their own home. While the women watching this show are engulfed in the drama, the men looking on in horror are left wondering two things:

1) Who the hell would marry these hell beasts? and…
2) Why is my girlfriend watching this and how will it ultimately affect me?

Now I can’t answer question #1 and I can’t imagine anyone walking this earth would actually be able to. But your girlfriend is watching it because she is getting some sort of pleasure from seeing these women make fools of themselves. Why? Because these hell beasts feel as if they are perfect. They make this very clear in the previews I see while I’m watching Top Chef (the greatest reality show ever created). Our girlfriends watch because seeing someone with a rather over-exaggerated sense of superiority prove themselves an ass is just about the best form entertainment one could experience.

At least that’s my theory. No one is actually watching this show because they think it’s good right?

…r… right?

*crickets*

Now I will not lie to you. I’m kind of a closet conspiracy theorist. And when I say “closet” I mean I make my girlfriend listen to every conspiracy theory that happens to pop into my head. With that said, I believe that Spiderman: Turn of the Dark has turned into the most elaborate broadway scheme ever concocted. This show, allegedly, costs about 65 million to produce. The only other show to even come close to this is Shrek. Not to mention, it also costs 1 million per week to actually maintain. Now Im not 100% sure these numbers are accurate but if they are even close to the real thing then the show is, in fact, fucked.

Or is it?

History shows us that people are generally satisfied with entertainment as long as they know what they are getting into. For instance, American Idol season premiers enjoy record breaking ratings season after season. What? H… huh? You mean people are tuning in to hear people sing badly and be ridiculed for two hours? Of course they are because, as I said, train-wrecks are entertaining.

I’m sure Spiderman set out to be a good show but somewhere along the line, someone realized that this is just isn’t possible. This show has been plagued with numerous setbacks. Most recent of course would be one of the actors plummeting 30 ft to the ground. But the other setbacks have been mostly hilarious. Actors being suspended in the air for a laughable amounts of time. Actors having to repeat their lines in songs because someone screwed up. Apparently there is a super-villain fashion show which is intentional and part of the show but can only be considered a “bad joke”. And I’m not really sure what THIS is supposed to be:

But:

Despite a constant barrage of bad news, however, Spider-Man has been nearly sold out in previews and has an advance that is greater than $20 million. If anything, the interest is just growing with the media frenzy surrounding the accidents.

This doesn’t surprise me. In fact, the three quotes you read at the beginning of this blog were people talking about wanting to see this. And what’s more, the last quote was from me. Yes… yes I want to see this. I want to see someone suspended in the air for 20 minutes while the stage crew comically try to retrieve him. Yes I want to see someone screw up their lines so another actor has to cover it up. And yes I would like to see what the hell a super-villain fashion show actually is. I know I’m being manipulated.

Much like the Real Housewives, people will derive some sort of pleasure from seeing things go wrong in this show. This 65 million dollar show. This show that touts the involvement of Bono… whom a lot of people hate I’m discovering. Every time I mention the fact that he’s involved, the main reaction I get is, and I quote:

“…fuckin Bono”.

At some point during a production meeting, where they all just rest their heads on the table and cry for 20 minutes, someone mentioned all the bad press this show has been getting. Then one, more intelligent, person said “wait… why don’t we run with this?”. And they did. Is this the point where they decided to throw that poor boy off that platform? Probably not. I don’t think they’re that evil. But the super-villain fashion show? That was intentional… and that part of he script was written in the blood of the devil.

And I can’t wait to see it.

The woman, who has not been named, is suing the internet giant for 600,000 Yen (£4,588) claiming the images caused her psychological distress, according to Japan’s Mainichi newspaper.

The first hearing in the case was held this week in the southern city of Fukuoka.
“I was overwhelmed with anxiety that I might be the target of a sex crime,” the woman told a district court. “It caused me to lose my job and I had to change my residence.” According to the suit, the woman first saw the photo on Google this spring when she did a search for her own apartment, where she lived alone.

The suit claims her existing obsessive-compulsive disorder was worsened by the anxiety brought on by the photo, as she feared that everything she was doing throughout the day was being secretly recorded.

Source

This, to me, is a slippery slope. If this woman can sue google for simply driving past her house at an inopportune time, then where does it all end? Soon, everyone that has been embarrassed a bit on google street view:

are gonna come out of the woodwork trying to cash in. I feel we should have more respect for our Google overlords.